You like me, you really like me!

I’ve been nominated for the 7×7 award!  Rather than setting out a list of the rules, which can be found here, I just worked them into the post.  As I recall, the last time I was nominated for a blog award, I lamented the fact that I wouldn’t get to walk down the virtual red carpet in my virtual couture.  Well, this time I’m making my own virtual red carpet to strut down!  Major advantage to virtual couture:  you don’t have to starve yourself to fit into it.  Also, no hairspray, and you can wear flats.  So here we go:

To present our next award, we have Jessica Alba and, of course, Johnny Depp!  Catch them in their latest movies, Ms. Alba in I Know I’ve Got More Talent Than This and Mr. Depp in Whatever Tim Burton Is Making This Time.

JA:  Thanks so much.  It’s a pleasure to be able to present this award to the Little Blind Girl.  Well-known for such posts as Why I Like the World Fuzzy, her most beautiful piece, and LBG’s Rules to Live By, her most helpful piece, the Little Blind Girl stumbles through this world bewildered but full of humor about the obstacles she encounters–something that was the subject of her most underrated post, and one of the ones with an audio version, Little Blind Red Riding Hood.

JD:  And of course, there is her most popular piece, Pick Up Lines by Johnny Depp.  Who can forget me fingering a turtleneck and saying, See this material?  It’s boyfriend material.  But seriously, folks, check out her most prideworthy piece, Mad Libs and Whistling Marmosets.  You’ll take something different away from it every time.

JA:  And don’t forget her most surprisingly successful piece, Oh I’m Gonna Hurt Some Feelings, All Right.  Quite a few hurt feelings reports submitted after that one!  But I’m most fond of her most controversial piece, True or False?  I’m still wondering if she has a tattoo!

JD:  You may not know this about LBG, as I like to call her, but she can put on eyeliner entirely by touch, a skill she keeps trying to practice on me.  Kind readers and gentle followers, without further ado, the Little Blind Girl!

(Little Blind Girl walks out, occasionally tripping over wires, steps, and people)

LBG:  Oh, my gosh, what an honor!  I just want to thank Lori Franks from Sunny Side Up for nominating me for this award.  Her blog is such an inspiration to me.  I know I can always turn to her for a smile.  I want to thank my Sainted Mother and my Darling Dad for all the blog lessons in my childhood, and Big Sis for beating up all the mean commenters.  This sort of honor really belongs to more than just me, so I want to nominate these blogs, because they deserve this award just as much as–oh, let’s be honest, more than I do!, for giving me artistic inspiration on tap.  For those of you who remember the Kraken Vacuum, he’s the artist!  New drawings every day from a very talented and funny guy., for going chapter by chapter through the books in the Twilight series to give us all a hilarious warning of what’s in store.  Mega-props for not getting discouraged in the midsection of New Moon, in which Bella is the most pathetic, whiny mess I’ve ever encountered in literature., for a daily glimpse into a loving, well-grounded, and excellently photographed family life.  She’s the cool Mom you loved to visit when your friends still lived at home.  Expectant mother meets snarky philosopher meets super-cool BFF.  You don’t need to be all into pregnancy blogs to enjoy her blogservations.  Hey, did I just coin a word?, who wrote the niftiest poem-blog about Christmas I’ve ever read.  Actually, it’s the only one I’ve ever read.  And it’s awesome!  Also the funniest reaction to being Freshly Pressed that I’ve come across.  Check it out., a.k.a. Mixed Gems, for your necessary dose of beauty, fashion, culture, and lifestyle.  You will become more beautiful, more fashionable, and more cultured just by reading her blog, I promise.  I just love him.  He’s hilarious, sweet, hilarious, awkward, and hilarious.  Reading his blog makes me feel all warm and happy, and occasionally nervous about dogs.

And of course, Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

And the award goes to….

Academy Award

Image via Wikipedia

I recently received a Versatile Blogger award nomination from onwindydays, which I think is super nifty keen!  I’m very flattered that anyone would think my blog is worthy of an award, and I’d like to thank onwindydays for the nomination.

Here’s the thing about the Versatile Blogger award, though:  it’s basically a chain letter for blogs.  It’s a really warm and fuzzy chain letter, but when you’re nominated, you’re supposed to nominate 10-15 other bloggers for the award, and they nominate 10-15 others, and so on until, as far as I can tell, no one is blogging about anything except how they’ve been nominated for the award!  Also, it doesn’t look like there’s any way actually to vote on which nominees win, which means I never get to put on my virtual couture gown, parade down the virtual red carpet, and look as if I virtually believe myself when someone else wins and I have to pretend to be thrilled for them.  Always a nominee, never a nom!

So I have created my own award:  The Don’t Read This Blog At Work award, for blogs that will make you laugh at inappropriate times if you’re not careful about where you are when you check them.  Here’s the award pic I created for it:

Here are my rules for the award:  you may nominate no more than three bloggers, each of whom must have made you laugh out loud with at least one post.  Those who receive the nominations may consider themselves as having received the award, and they must post a gushing acceptance speech thanking the person who nominated them, perhaps thanking any companion animals they may blog about (I would thank my whistling marmoset, for example), and maybe closing with a shout out to their lord and savior or, failing that, their parents.  Those who receive the award may, but need not, pass on the award, but will not themselves be eligible again until they have published at least ten more posts.  There will be absolutely no oversight of any of this, so feel free to violate the rules at your pleasure.

So there you go: I’ve created this award, and now I’m sending it out into the world.  Who am I nominating?  Onwindydays!  Not just a pretty site, this blog will make you laugh at the blogger’s inveterate procrastination from studying, and then reaffirm your faith in basic decency when you see what a sweet, clever, kind-hearted person the blogger is.  I highly recommend perusing the blog, especially if you have a test or major project you’re trying to put off getting ready for.  And thanks for the nomination, sweetie!