Monthly Archives: October 2011

Halloween, God’s favorite holiday

Jack-o-latern

Image via Wikipedia

Well, it’s my favorite holiday, anyway.  Grown-up halloween parties are almost as much fun as trick or treating; more alcohol, less candy, decent trade-off.  This year I went as a sorority girl.  I’ve been seeing them prancing around in their miniskirts and Ugg boots (why???), so I just went with it:  college hoodie, denim mini, cable-knit tights, fleece-lined boots, and a red solo cup.  Then I piled on the bronzer and blush and the really dark eye makeup and put my hair in a messy ponytail and voila!  World’s cheapest Halloween costume.  I already had everything but the hoodie, though never in quite that combination.  I looked dreadful–hilarious, but dreadful.

So I go downstairs to the lobby of my building to wait for my ride, and who should come along but a bunch of college guys who totally mistake me for a sorority girl.  They’re telling me about their plans and how much they’ve had to drink already, and explaining about this movie they saw in that patronizing way that guys think is charming.  You’d think the fact that my friend was standing beside me in full-on medieval queen garb and feathered mask would have clued them in to the fact that I was in costume, but like I said, they’d been pre-gaming.  So, yeah, thirty years old and I can still apparently pass for a student, at least to drunk frat guys.  Definitely my favorite holiday.  Now I just have to find and destroy all the photographs.  That skirt was a lot shorter than I remember it being.

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Three and a half billion Brad Pitts

A blog by a blind girl?  How?  Why?  Well, the why is my friends who, when I said “Who would read a blog I wrote?”, answered “I would!”  We’ll see how that turns out.  The how is going to be a little more tricky, so please forgive typos.

I’ve always thought that being legally blind let me notice things that other people don’t–changes in people’s voices, the way the barks of different trees feel.  It’s actually pretty cool.  But there’s one phenomenon that I think I’m going to have to ask for feedback on: strangely, whenever I tell a guy that I can’t see what he looks like, he tells me he bears a striking resemblance to Brad Pitt.  This is not the case with women–I get all sorts of responses from them (interestingly, Jennifer Aniston is a more common response than Angelina Jolie).  I’m a little alarmed at the number of Brad Pitts out there, clogging the Abercrombie stores and adopting the world’s orphans willy nilly.  Please, guys, find someone else to resemble!  Poor Brad’s got to be a little tired of running into himself everywhere, and think how confusing it must be for Angie.

So tell me, my sighted friends:  is the world full of Brad Pitts?  It’s been a while since I could see properly, but I’m pretty sure that was not the case when I was young.

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