Whenever I want to say something rude, I get this weird feeling like my grandmother is listening in from heaven, so I chicken out.  But if there’s one thing we’ve all learned from the internet, it’s that cute animals make everything okay, right?  Well, that and a few things about porn that I really wish I didn’t know, but “Rude Things I Wanted To Say, As Told By Porn Stars” would involve a lot of really awkward photo editing and would probably still end up being rude.  So here are the rude things I’ve wanted to say lately, as told by cute animals because that makes it okay:

1.   While in traffic:

2.  While waiting in line:

3.  While in the park:

4.  While on a date:

5.  While at a stoplight next to a driver who’s playing a song that’s mostly bass:

6.  While in a meeting:

7.  While at a family reunion:

8.  While watching reality television:

9.  While stuck in a waiting room with The Guy Who Wouldn’t Shut Up:

10.  While on hold with my phone company for the fifth time:

Whew, I feel much better now!  I hope this was as cathartic for you as it was for me.  If it wasn’t, I’d tell you what I think about that, but I’m out of cute animal pictures, so you’re just going to have to guess.

[all images are in the public domain and available on pixabay.com; text added by author]