Office cold/flu: You know, Little Blind Girl, I’m really liking it here in your respiratory system. I was thinking of setting up shop for a while, maybe get a little sinus infection going… something for the little viruses, you know?
Little Blind Girl: I hate you.
Office cold/flu: Oh, you don’t mean that. I can tell! You’ve made it so cushy in here, with your malnourishment and your lowered immune system from eating all that junk. Clearly, your subconscious longed for this.
Little Blind Girl: I hate you more every hour.
Office cold/flu: Now, now, if that were true, you would have gone to the doctor by now. I know you like to blame it on work and say you don’t have time, but I think we both know what’s really going on here, don’t we?
Little Blind Girl: I hope you die.
Office cold/flu: Is that a nice thing to say to your new life partner?
Little Blind Girl: Oh, God, why? What did I do that was so bad that I deserve this?
Office cold/flu: I was thinking of setting up my office in your left sinus cavity. The right cavity is bigger, but the left cavity has such a lovely view of your optic nerve.
Little Blind Girl: Leave my optic nerve alone! Sweet Jesus, am I talking to a virus? I’ve gone round the twist at last.
Office cold/flu: I’m so glad I’ve finally found a place I can call home.
Little Blind Girl: You. Me. Doctor’s office. Tomorrow morning. Antibiotics at twenty paces. To the death!
5 thoughts on “Me vs. the office cold”
I am sure the doc will give you the fastest 6-shooter around town. Just make sure you nail office cold/flu’s coffin tight!
I sprayed it with holy disinfectant and buried it in unconsecrated tissues. I think we’re safe!
I had the same conversation with THE sinus infection for two weeks. It was a real fight. Sinus infection was winning while I was snorkling in the BVI. Hard to snorkle with your nose running and a cough. Came home and decided to go one on one with THE sinus infection. Amoxicillen vs. THE sinus infection. Took ten days but said infection is now history. THE sinus infection has a bad attitude. Kick it’s ass LBG!
.Uhmmm, maybe, just mayber, my posting was a tad on the RWGW side. Jus’sayin’.
Well, maybe; you were complaining about how the sinus infection interfered with your snorkeling! But the sinus infection does have a bad attitude, and I’m fairly sure it doesn’t care about your socioeconomic status, so whine all you want!