A friend of mine who is blogging about training to run a marathon posted about the pain she experienced the first time she and a friend tried Pilates. I experienced similar pain when I first tried to do decline sit ups. Those are the ones where you lie back on a bench tilted so that your head is down near the floor and your knees are at the top, and then you do sit ups. They hurt like hell, but not until the next day. No one warned me, so I did several dozen. I went to bed that night feeling very pleased with myself.
The next day I tried to get out of bed and nearly blacked out from the pain. I couldn’t move until later in the day, and only after I’d taken a handful of over the counter painkillers and stood under a hot shower for half an hour. That evening, someone made me laugh and I punched them out. Well, not really, but I wanted to.
Since then I’ve been careful to warm up before exercising, patiently stretching and making sure I don’t push myself beyond what I should just because I’m not currently falling down. I get a fair amount of exercise, though I wouldn’t run a marathon if you promised me a garden of daffodils and a pony at the end of it, and I feel sympathetic but gently superior when people complain about how much pain they’re in because they didn’t warm up properly or they had an overly bruising work out.
I did some spring cleaning this weekend. I climbed on ladders to reach high places, I stood on kitchen counters to get to the tops of the cabinets, I got on my hands and knees to clean under the refrigerator, I moved furniture to clean under and around it, and I scrubbed the floor on my hands and knees. It took the entire weekend. I was exhausted at the end of it and was really, really grateful that it was done and I could go on about my normal life.
The next morning, I went to get out of bed and couldn’t move. It was like I had done a hundred decline sit ups, run five miles, climbed a mountain, and carried a small buffalo, all without warming up. I looked around my sparkling apartment and thought, you know, I’m legally blind. It’s all a big blur to me anyway. How clean do I really need it to be?
Sorry, Mom. The dirt and I have decided to make it official. To be honest, I’m surprised this hasn’t happened earlier. I still don’t have full range of motion in my arms, and every time I sneeze (thanks for the cold, by the way, Unknown Waiter With Hacking Cough. I want my tip back), I see stars. And, would you believe it, after all that, I got my trash bags all lined up for a trip to the trash chute–and it’s backed up! It’s just as well, really. I don’t think I could have lifted the bags that high up, anyway. So here’s to dirt and me: from now on, my name is Mud.
9 thoughts on “Pain, pain, go away”
I was pleased with myself for doing 8 miles on the stationary bike in under 30 minutes last night. Today, my knees are so sore I can barely walk. I’m thinking of just giving up and living with being Fatty McFatfat. It might not be as hard on my joints.
Weight training with a little bit of cardio is the quickest way to get in better shape. Not that I’m a work out fanatic or anything, just know what works 🙂 Working on a stationary bike really only works your calves, and your quads a bit.
LBG, if I promise you a field full of poppies and a gentle baby tiger, would you come spring clean my place? 🙂
Nobody is Fatty McFatfat! And I think it would take an actual unicorn to get me to do any more spring cleaning…
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Why do we torture ourselves? It’s terrible I tell you!
I think I caught the madness from my Sainted Mother. It just feels like Something We Should Do. Also, my apartment was being inspected!
Ah, no more spring cleaning! I concur. However, I’m already looking forward to the end-of-summer cleaning! And then the mid-winter cleaning. The anticipation! The pure joy of something to live for! (You, not me, of course…I’ve got better things to do). I’m just looking forward to your blog posts.
You’re mad! Mad, I tell you!
And your point would be?